They’ve made me change to this really boring and ugly hospital gown and a nurse is soon going to come in for some blood samples. The surgery isn’t until another 3 hours, but I’m already getting really nervous. Everything seems so scary when the word surgery is involved..
I’m hungry. They won’t let me eat. I’ve been forced to stay away from food since midnight because they want me to have an empty stomach during the surgery to prevent from further complications. I haven’t slept, not even a little. I’ve been awake all night because I’m too nervous to sleep.
There’s a bit of excitement in me; but I’m mostly just really scared at the moment.
are you looking for happiness?
There are so many things that bring joy to us in our daily life basis, but we’re too busy to notice them because they’re usually found in tiny gestures; such as a stranger passing by and saying “hello” with a smile on their lips. Happiness might come in smaller doses than other emotions, but that does not make it less important. If anything, we should embrace these things more. I feel as if we keep on ignoring what makes us happy, we will end up not remembering how it genuinely feels to be happy.
Most people seek for happiness during their whole life, but they keep on overlooking it because they’re greedy for larger amounts of happiness. I know that this will sound really cliché, but I think that all of us should cherish what we have, before it’s too late. You better embed this into your brain, learn it now rather than when you actually lose someone/something that is important to you.
ten tiny moments of happiness in my not too exciting life:
- when i catch my friends saying words or sounds that i usually say/make because they hear me say it so often (e.g. mamaaa, omg orkar inte med livet, kommer slå dig, släng dig, etc.)
- my friends mentioning that they dreamt of me and for once; i didn’t die in their dream
- new episodes being released of that one show that i really enjoy watching
- when my friends send me links of stuff (videos, images, texts) that remind them of me
- angrily agreeing with people over opinions that we have in common
- when people say that my presence makes them happy (bestes compliment ever, thanks people)
- when friends make me drawings (i seriously cannot fathom how a person can put down their own time to create something4me) handmade creations are the bestest~ (◡‿◡✿)
- sitting with friends during lunch; imitating different teachers and/or our mothers
- when my friends know exactly what i’m thinking without having me spell it out for them
- being comfortable enough around a friend to rest my head on their head when s/he trusts me enough to rest their head on my shoulder; because i usually feel very awkward and anxious when it comes to physical contact with people - being able2trust people feels good :)
most of these points must seem really narcissistic because they’re all about “me, me, me”, but eh, that’s why i’ve listed them as moments of happiness in my life, so… now that you know a bit of what makes me happy; tell me.. what makes you happy? what is happiness to you?